Love Stinks
by Phoenix Reece
Summary: A funny love story about a skunk with OCD and A chubby Koala with a video game habit.OCxPetunia Chapter six, the final chapter, is out!
1. Nerds in a chat room

**Author's Note**

Good god, it's happened. A FAN CREATED OC IS IN A PAIRING WITH A REAL HTF! EVERYONE RUN!

Chunky: Hey, at least I'm not dating Flippy. (Zing!)

Anyhoo, this is just another little story I've thought up, a ChunkyxPetunia pairing. That being said, I'm gonna try and make it a funny love story, and hopefully it won't get too serious. So kick back, relax, and enjoy

**Love Stinks: the tale of a skunk and a Koala**

Logging on….

Welcome to the "l33t Pwner" forums, signing in as "TheChunkster13"

TheChunkster13: Hey guys, what's up?

Iron_Man_Folgore: Sup Chunks?

MightyMightyFrankie: Hi!

TheChunkster13: Oh guys, I feel so wonderful… (^-^)

Iron_Man_Folgore: WTF?

MightyMightyFrankie: What happened? Did you finally catch that beetle you've been looking for?

TheChunkster13: Heh, yeah right. This is even better than that digital Butterfly you caught a while

back….

MightyMightyFrankie: What? Better than Francine? Surely you jest!

TheChunkster13: I finally asked her out, that girl I told you about….

Iron_Man_Folgore: And?....

TheChunkster13: She said yes.

MightyMightyFrankie: HIGH TECHNICAAAAAAAL!

Iron_Man_Folgore: NICE!

TheChunkster13: I know, but I'm a little nervous. We're going out to dinner tonight, and I don't

know how to act around a girl…. But Folgore, you have a girlfriend, right? Any tips?

Iron_Man_Folgore: Of course, I'd love to help you out pal. Just be a gentleman, hold the door, pull out

her chair for her, and whatever you do, don't acknowledge any, ANY of her faults. As far as you're

concerned, she's perfect.

TheChunkster13: That'll be easy. She's already perfect.

MightyMightyFrankie: And make sure you give her nice things, my girlfriend ADORED the "Pretty

Princess" poster I got her. But how could you not love a collecter's item signed by the director and

original voice actor?

TheChunkster13: Um, good idea, but wasn't that girl just some random chick you met and tried to use

your "Nerd2Babe simulator" on?

MightyMightyFrankie: Sh-Shut up! You don't know what you're talking about! That girl was all over me!

TheChunkster13: Sure pal, anyhow, I gotta get ready. See you guys

TheChunkster13 has logged off

MightyMightyFrankie: Hey, Folgore, do you think I'll ever get a hot babe of my own?

Iron_Man_Folgore has logged off

MightyMightyFrankie: …….

------------------------------------------------------------------

That's the opening chapter Pretty good start if I do say so myself. By the way, MightyMightyFrankie was

Francis, from Super Paper Mario. And Iron_man_Folgore was Me, it's the old name I always used before

Phoenix Reece. Oh, and I got this whole Chat Room opening idea, from Deadliving's **Hive System.** God, I

really need some of my own ideas


	2. Chunky to the rescue!

**Author's Note**

Yar, it be me, Phoenix! Man oh man! I'm pumping out these stories faster than some kinda hilarious euphemism about something that happens very often!....... Sorry, when you write this much it's hard to think up good jokes. On with the show then……

**Love Stinks: The Story of a Skunk and a Koala**

Chunky pushed the keyboard away and gave a contented sigh, the kind he usually only let out after a big meal. He was going out with the girl of his dreams, and he couldn't believe it. It had all happened today; he rescued the girl, and won her heart. It was a dream come true. And to think he owed it all to that spaz Nutty.

*Flash Back*

Chunky sat quietly on the park bench after school, playing his DS and munching on a snack cake. He had stayed after for a club, the school newspaper. He always loved submitting stories when he was younger, and not but two years later they had promoted him to editor. He every so often saw Petunia and Giggles waiting for their late bus, as the Environmental Protection Club met on the same day. He would always sneak a glance at her, Petunia of course. He wasn't really that close to Cuddles, but that guy was reckless and he didn't want to be caught with Giggles when he showed up. He wasn't even interested in her anyway. Giggles was cute, but in a Girl Scout way. Petunia was always so mature, and well groomed, and smelled so nice, and… Chunky realized he was staring at her, and quickly turned his eyes back to the Pokemon battle on the screen. He was so worried about Petunia finding out he was staring and thinking he was a pervert that he didn't notice he bouncing green squirrel sneak up behind him.

"HI CHUNKAY!" He shouted, and laughed wildly

"Gah! You know I hate that Nutty, how are you today?" He asked, shaking of the surprise.

"Penny for your Twinkie?" Nutty asked, completely ignoring Chunky's question.

"You know you can have it for free, I always pack extra." Chunky said, and tossed Nutty another pack of them from his backpack. Nutty, smitten with delight, hopped around singing.

"I got two Twinkies! I got Two Twinkies! I got Two Twinkies! Hey Hey Hey Hey!"

"Nutty, keep it down! Pet- I mean, someone might stare!" Chunky said, jumping up and covering his mouth.

"Ohhhh, someone's gotta little crush!" Nutty giggled, and pulled Chunky's hand off of his mouth "HEY PETUNIA!"

"Gah! You imbecile!" Chunky said, and smacked him over the head. Harder than he thought, in fact, as Nutty went tumbling onto the pavement. Petunia turned and looked over to the two,

"Hmmm? Either of you call?" She asked.

Chunky, thinking quickly, responded, "Uhh, if we did, it was a wrong number. I was actually calling my aunt Sophia!" He said laughing nervously and holding up his phone. Petunia laughed a little and turned back around to wait for the bus. Feeling a little guilty, he helped Nutty up. But Nutty was fine, and actually was laughing.

"I don't know what's funnier, how lame your jokes are, or the fact that Petunia inhaled enough cleaning fumes to laugh at them!" He said, tumbling over once again, this time holding his sides.

"Hey! Don't you go saying anything about petunia! Her brain's twice as functional as that sugar coated raisinet crammed in your skull!"

"Oh calm down Romeo!" said Nutty, helping himself up, "Just having a little fun. Besides, if you like her so much, ask her out! I'm sure she's single, and maybe a little desperate."

"Uh, I think I need a few more experience points in charisma before I try that one out, Nutty" Chunky said, bashfully.

"Well, you'd better hurry and level up, because The Dark Lord Shifty and his henchman Lifty The Scourge are making a move on your princess." He said, pointing. Chunky looked over and noticed that Lifty and Shifty had surrounded Petunia by the tree she was leaning against "C'mon honey, I even stole this for ya." Shifty said, pulling out a small gold ring. He was smoking a cigarette and blew the smoke near her face.

"Bleck! Stay away from me you creep. I don't want anything you stole, and besides, you reek of nicotine!" He said, trying to push him back. Shifty was stronger than her though, and didn't budge.

"Hey, this little slut seems pretty ungrateful, maybe you should teach her a lesson." Lifty laughed.

"No no no, brother! I'll forgive her, when she agrees to go out with me!" He chuckled.

Chunky was officially freaking out at this point, breaking into a cold sweat. He panted with terror, but kept his breathing quiet, despite the fact that the scene was going on at least 20 feet from him. Chunky's eyes darted around, and found no monitors, no teachers, and no adults. All he found was Nutty.

"Nutty! What should I do! They're gonna rape her, or maybe even kill her!" He said, terrified

Nutty was thinking to himself "Yeah right, neither of those two have the balls so do something like that. Then again, if I play into this, I just might help him get lucky!" Nutty cringed at the sight of the 'Attack' "Jeez pal, you might be right. Here, you rush in and ambush 'em! I'll be right behind you if things get to hairy."

"You will?"

"Sure thing buddy."

Chunky mustered up every nerve in his body, and sent his large body barreling down at the two raccoons. As he picked up speed, he bellowed "LEEEEEEROOOOOY JEEEEEKIIIIIINS!" Shifty noticed this, and calmly sidestepped, all Chunky's flailing arms managed to do was knock off his fedora. Lifty, however, didn't know what was happening until his brother stepped aside, and was bowled over by the enormous koala. As Lifty steadied his shaking body, Shifty shouted angrily at the koala.

"You idiot! Do you have any Idea how much this fedora costs? Do you think I stole it just to have some obese freak knock it off into the mud?"

"Your frigging fedora! That's all you're concerned about? That freak nearly squashed me under his fat ass!" Lifty screamed at his brother. Before you could say "Problem Children", the raccoon brothers were shouting at each other right there in front of the school. Sensing a quick moment to talk, Chunky turned to Petunia and asked "Are you okay? Where's Giggles?"

"She got picked up by her mom. And I'm fine, but what are you doing here?"

"Something I should have done awhile ago."Chunky said, and tapped Shifty on the shoulder. When the raccoon turned to face him, he reeled back and delivered a heavy punch straight to the face. The immense "weight" behind the punch sent Shifty literally flying into the side of a bus. Lifty, of course, found this hilarious and laughed wildly at his brother. Shifty, of course, pulled himself up and tackled his brother, and they began rolling around the sidewalk. Chunky turned to face Petunia again.

"Wow, that was… brave! I've never seen this side of you before, Chunks." She said, amazed

"Uh, yeah, I usually prefer a pacifistic approach, but that would have gotten me shanked in this situation. " Chunky said.

"Well, even fighting could have gotten you killed, weren't you scared?"

"Well, I haven't been here very long, but we get killed quite a lot here, don't we? Besides, I got killed Tuesday anyway. I invited Flippy and Flaky over for a game of Scrabble. I knew it was a bad idea, but 'Vietcong' was a triple word bonus."

Petunia couldn't help laughing at him, "Jeez, you sure make death sound funny"

"Well, Flippy didn't find it too funny when he was jamming my head into a popcorn maker, but hey, gotta keep a stiff upper lip." Chunky said, He couldn't believe his own mouth. The socially awkward geek was actually chatting happily with a beautiful girl, and making her laugh.

"Hey, are you doing anything tonight?" She asked, " I was going to go out to this new restaurant with Giggles, but she had to reschedule. Would you care to come with?

Chunky nearly choked, but kept his cool, "Uh, sure! I'm not doing anything tonight. Got a raid in WoW, but they've got plenty of hunters already."

"Well alright, meet me at my house. 7:00 pm."

" Would you like me to provide the ride? My uncle goes out clubbing around that time anyway"

"Sure, just make sure DB doesn't do anything, creepy."

"I'll keep him on a leash." He said, and they both laughed. Petunia got on his bus and Chunky hopped on his. They were both gone by the time the two brothers realized what was going on.

"Hey bro! That obese Koala swiped your girl!" Lifty said, brushing himself off.

"I noticed, dumbass. Looks like we're going to have to mess them up a little" said Shifty.

"Like how, beat 'em up?"

"No re-re. Just leave it to me. I've got a plan!"

"This better work, bro."

"Would I be wearing the fedora if my plans didn't work, o ye of little faith?" And so the two raccoon brothers hopped on their bikes and road off towards Petunia's. Nutty just laughed as he munched up the last Twinkie in Chunky's backpack. "Wow, gotta hand it to him, I thought he'd just win over the girl out of pity when those two kicked his ass" He jumped off the bench and walked off towards Chunky's house "Well, better return this to the old Chunkster, oh but wait. Is this his wallet? I'd better buy some chocolates for petunia, any maybe something for good old Nutty…"

------------------------------------------------------------------------

There ya have it, chapter two! I apologize to all those Shifty and Lifty fans, but they're so easy to make villains. Well, that's all folks!


	3. Smooth Criminals

**Author's Note**

Hey, Phoenix here, little sleepy, but still up for a bit of writing…..

In fact, since you've all been such good little readers, I've decided to give you all a little treat in this author's note. My very own, brand new, fresh from the market, one of a kind and only here, Chunky Smootchie! Enjoy! (Oh, and the actual story is here too. Just scroll down a bit)

**Chunky's Videogame(what else?) Smootchie**

Scene opens with Chunky standing alone in a purple room. He waves at the camera and smiles nervously. After a few seconds, the choices appear and Chunky waits patiently scratching the back of his ear.

**Legend of Zelda: **A shield and sword drop from the sky. Chunky recoils in terror, but none of them hit him. He looks at the sword and shield with wonder and pick them up. He swings the sword around and holds the shield up to block imaginary foes a few times, but then notices something in the shield. He pulls a bow and arrows out and fires one off screen. He looks off into the distance after the arrow, and when the sound of an arrow hitting a wooden target sounds he cheers and yells, "alright!" But then he notices something else in the shield. He pulls out a large blue bomb, but is shocked when he realizes it's lit. In a panic, he throws it away, in the same direction he fired the arrow, and turns and plugs his ears. But the bomb bounces off the unseen target with the sound of a ping-pong ball hitting a wall and flies back, exploding just before hitting Chunky in the head. When the smoke clears, there's only a black smudge on the ground. After a few seconds, Chunky and a health potion land. Chunky's lower torseo was torn off, leaving him to drag himself over to the potion. The sword from before falls out of the sky and pins him to the ground. Then hails of arrows fall into him, making him resemble a chubby pincushion. Finally, Chunky reaches for the potion with his last ounce of life, but the shield falls and knocks him on the head, finishing him off. *static*

Before this one starts, Chunky takes out a candy bar and greedily scarfs it.

**Halo: **Chunky is just standing around, when a costume rack wheels by him. When it's gone, Chunky is wearing Spartan (The Master Chief kind) armor, save for the helmet, and holding a battle rifle. He hears the sound of approaching troops and fires off screen at them. The enemies return fire, but Chunky throws an energy shield down to block them. He laughs and mumbles something about "noobs" while reloading his rifle, but doesn't realize the plasma grenade that flies out from the other side of the screen and lands on the back of his head, sticking. He hears the beeping, and soon realizes what it is. He desperately claws at the back of his head to remove it, but to no avail, and his head is blown clean off. After a few seconds, his decapitated body slumps over on the ground. *Static*

Before the last smootchie starts, he pulls out a Mario Bros coin, complete with sound effects, then stashes it in his pocket.

**Tertris: **Chunky is standing around, minding his own business when a block drops near him. He is shocked, but realizing what it is he laughs, and looks around as another block drops on the other side of him. He leans on the first block and stares at the other in amazement. A third block falls down on top of the first, crushing Chunky's arm. He screams in pain and desperately tries to pull it free, but just tires himself out. He rests his other arm on top of the block, unaware that another is falling, and crushes his other arm. Chunky screams in agony as he struggles to get free, but looks up at a falling shadow, and his pupils shrink. A final block lands on his neck, causing a painful snap. He gurgles in pain, still not dead, as another lands on top, and another. Soon his spine begins cracking, and finally gives out, crushing him.

*Static*

Well, hope you enjoyed that, and if you didn't sorry. I just had the idea and decided to add it into Love Stinks as a bonus. Now onto the main event!

**Love Stinks.**

Over at Petunia's house, just around the time Chunky's bus had arrived at his house, Petunia's had arrived at hers. However, a couple of conniving raccoons had used a few Big Bad Wolf-style shortcuts, and arrived at her house before her, waiting in the bushes a couple houses down. They sat on their bikes, anticipating Petunia's arrival. "Alright, here she comes! Ready Lifty?" Shifty called to his brother

"Ready Shifty!" Lifty laughed and started peddling, his brother close behind. As petunia stepped off her bus, and crossed over to his side of the street, the two brothers sped by her, knocking a puddle of mud onto her. Staying in her usual character, she screams and runs into her house, leaving the door wide open. Shifty and Lifty, giving their trademark laughs, toss their bikes in a nearby bush and head into her house.

"Now," Shifty outlined the plan for his brother as they walked in and upstairs. "Here's the deal. Now Petunia's got a high powered shower nozzle, so she couldn't hear a blowhorn in that thing. So what we do is, get up there and swipe her deodorizer, and replace it with this." He pulls out a pine tree deodorizer. "It looks normal right, but I've taken a can of green spray paint and given it a thick coat. It looks the same, but the dried out paint will seal away the pine scent. Without it, Petunia reeks to high heaven. Chunky will get one whiff of her and flee ASAP. She'll never forgive him, and I'll swoop in to console her, winning her over."

"Dude, you told me the plan on the way over," Lifty groaned. "What I wanna know is, how is this gonna work? First off, won't Petunia realize she stinks and replace the deodorizer? And how do you know she smells so bad without it?"

"Ah, ah, ah, bro." Remember when we were eight years old, and mom took you to the dentist?"

"How could I forget? I got two teeth pulled that day."

"Well, she dropped me off on the way over at Petunia's eighth birthday party. But you couldn't go because of the appointment. It was a real nice thing, balloons, a clown, cake and all, but one thing was wrong. Something smelled, literally. We first thought someone was still in diapers, and narrowed the list down to Petunia. We all started making fun of her, but she just kept crying about how she didn't smell anything. Then her mother yelled at us and took Petunia inside. When she came out, she didn't smell, and everything was A okay. Except I noticed when mom came to pick me up, she had a talk with Petunia's mom. When we were in the car, she had a talk with me. She scolded me about making fun of Petunia's smell and said that her deodorizer had just run out, but then she said something unbelievable. She said not to make fun of Petunia anymore because she had no sense of smell. Apparently she had a sinus infection when she was an infant and the doctors were able to cure her, but she can't smell anymore. After that incident, Petunia became obsessed with cleanliness, and eventually developed OCD. It's actually kind of sad." He said, and the two brothers became silent as they crept into the bathroom.

The steam and noise of the shower made the two expert thieves invisible. They quickly swapped out the Pine scented deodorizer for the dud, and were ready to slip away when Lifty noticed something on the ground. In her rush to get clean, Petunia must have thrown her clothes on the ground, a rare occurrence indeed. Out of curiosity, (And a little bit of perversion) he picked up Petunia's discarded panties and gave a deep sniff, but nearly choked on his own vomit. Swallowing the puke, he turned to his brother and smiled. "Lord almighty! Is that what she smells like without this thing? If Chunky doesn't dump her, he'll suffocate on those fumes!"

"Oh he will dump her, make no mistake." Shifty said, and thought to himself "Nobody would stay with someone like that. Nobody's loyal to anyone anymore…"

The two thieves leaped from Petunia's window, and went along their merry way. Shifty, still reflective and serious, made his brother concerned. "Hey bro, c'mon! It's another successful robbery! Sing it with me! YOW!" He laughed and started moonwalking. Shifty couldn't help cracking a smile and began moonwalking with his brother as they sang.

"Annie are you okay? You okay? You okay Annie? Annie are you okay? You okay? You okay Annie? You've been hit by, you've been struck by a smooth criminal…."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Punching out chapters like it's going out of style baby! Just so you know, the song L&S sing at the end is "Smooth Criminal" By Alien Ant Farm. **WHICH I DO NOT OWN! (Smooth Criminal (C) Alien ant farm, and Michael Jackson.)**Hope everybody enjoyed, and will review, my little story. Phoenix Reece, out!


	4. The Ride

**Author's note**

You know, while this story may not be popular as "Disco Rising", I'm gonna keep writing, because it make me happy. And there's nothing you can do to stop me, society! Unless you cut off both my hands. But please don't, I need these for masturbating! Anywho, now that I've given you more knowledge than you needed about my personal life, on with the story!

**Love Stinks**

Petunia stepped from the shower, refreshed and relaxed. She did her usual post-shower routine and folded her towel neatly, placing it in the hamper, and did the same with her clothing. She quickly folded her undergarments, a little embarrassed that she forgot to put them away. "Well, at least no one got to see them, yet at least" She said quietly and giggled to herself. Stepping up to her mirror, Petunia placed her flower on her head and deodorizer around her neck, applied some various creams and moisturizers to give her face a nice shine, and headed into her room to change for tonight. For hours on end her house was filled with "No, too plain" and groans of "I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR!" until she finally had decided on an outfit.

Staring at herself in the mirror, Petunia could see purple tank top and navy blue skirt much better. "Now, I just need something to tie this all together, OH! Those earrings!" She said, running to her dresser, and pulling out a small jewelry box. A while back, Giggles was having a fund-raiser sale for the environmental protection club, and she found these earrings were perfect for her. They were small jade leaves, accented along the stems and veins with lighter green gemstones. "Perfect," She said, clipping them on. "Just like a eucalyptus leaf. That's what koalas eat, right." And then she thought to herself "Then again, Chunky must be eating something other than leaves or he wouldn't be so, No! What am I thinking, that's so rude!" She ran downstairs, it being just about seven (Which is odd, given that she set out to get ready at around 3 o clock.) and waited patiently on her sofa. Petunia's house was always pretty quiet now a days, given her parents were always on vacation without her. She guessed they were always out to avoid getting maimed, as such was the case with all the residents of Happy Tree Town, she didn't mind, however. Petunia was actually quite well-to-do, and could easily support herself, occasional deaths aside.

Feeling a little stuffy(most likely nervous as well), she headed for the window, opening it up into the backyard. As Petunia took a deep breath of fresh air and held her arms up into the night, the rosebushes near the windowsill wilted almost immediately. "Huh, I need to water these more," She said, and walked back over to the couch to have a seat.

As she sat thinking about tonight with a twittering heart, bright headlights flashed in the windows, and Petunia knew Chunky had arrived. A knock on the door, and she ran to open it. There, standing in the light of her front stoop was Chunky. "Hi Petunia, you look, uh, beautiful tonight. Ready to go?"

"Sure, let's go." She said and walked with him to Disco's car. As she passed under the light of the front stoop, the moths fluttering around it froze in midair, and fell down to earth, dead.

Earlier, at Chunky's house

Once he was finished chatting with his nerd pals, Chunky had decided to unwind with a few online quick matches. Of course, a few turned into more, and more, until he had completely forgotten about the time. When, around 6 o' clock, Disco called up to the Koala's room.

"Hey, playa! You just about ready for your date, Funky Chunky?"

Chunky glanced at the clock slowly, and did a double take. He tossed the controller onto his bed, and ran to the shower. After a quick scrub to rinse out his fur, he ran to the medicine cabinet, taking out a can of Chocolate body spray "Guaranteed to make you _Delicious_" and applied a thick coat. "I wonder if Petunia Likes chocolate as much as me?" He thought, and walked into his room, completely forgetting about a towel, which made Disco squirm as he glanced upstairs

"Aw, c'mon chunks! I don't gotta see that man!" he said, covering "You know, I don't appreciate yourunning around nude in my house, pal!" Chunky had been living in his uncle Disco's house ever since hearrived in Happy Tree Town, due to his parents always having to be out for their jobs. He was so used to the house now he could be, well, naked in it and still be comfortable. It was practically his home.

Within mere minutes, Chunky was ready to go. He wore a black polo shirt and a tan vest, along with a pair of black dress pants he usually only wore while working as a waiter. "Wow, Chunkster, you clean up goooood!" Disco said, almost disbelieving that this was his nephew, "Now are you ready to go?"

"Just a second!" Chunky yelled down the stairs. Darting back into his room, he found a small black jewelry box. He opened it to check on the contents, and sighed with relief. Still contained inside was a small golden Tri-force pin, altered to be a necklace, and carved in the back was a small inscription. Careful hands had written "Petunia" in elegant script. Chunky had decided to make it in the basement around last Christmas, but never worked up the guts to give it to Petunia. He took a deep sigh thinking about the times he could have asked her out, but was too afraid. With the box in hand and his wallet in his back pocket, he bounded down the stairs and followed his uncle into the car.

"Hey uncle, could you do me a favor?"

"Sure pal, whatcha need"

"Don't say anything rude to Petunia, please?"

"Rude? When am I ever rude to a wo-" He began, but a glare from Chunky reminded him of a few instances and they both go into the car.

Currently

As the two entered approached the car, Chunky, still trying to be a gentleman, opened the door for Petunia. She sat in the back seat, and Chunky sat next to her. "Aw, now don't you two look cute." Disco chuckled and started up the car.

As they cruised through darkened road, Petunia watching the night sky contently. The various night lights of the town danced across the sky, bringing thoughts of fireflies or twinkling stars, at least to Petunia they did. Chunky, nervously watching her body thought he smelled something, foul. He shrugged it off, thinking he must be imagining things, but the smell became worse and worse as they drove along. Chunky realized it must be either him, or Petunia. He smelled himself, no still chocolate. He leaned over carefully to Petunia and gave a quick sniff, he recoiled quickly, the smell being much more intense around his date. Petunia, noticing Chunky's sudden shift, leaned over closer to him.

"Is everything okay? She asked

"Yeah, peachy. Just perfect" He lied to her. Petunia gave a smile and turned over to the window again, and slowly leaned backwards.

"You know, the night sky in this town makes me so sleepy," She said, now resting her head on Chunky's shoulder, "You don't mind me here, do you?"

"Of course not, I'd love it." Chunky said, and thought to himself "Oh lord, I'm getting dizzy…."

Disco, in the front seat, had just noticed the intense smell wafting from the back seat "Whoah what the funk?" He thought, and turned the rearview mirror to the back seat. In it he saw Petunia leaning on Chunky, while the Koala was twitching slightly and his eyes were starting to roll back into his head "Poor chunkster, at least he's having a gas back there! Time for a little 'Disco Intervention'"

"Hey kids, mind if I pop the top off this thing?" he called back to them

Petunia sat up with joy "Oh! This is a convertible? Please do!" And with that, the bear flipped the switch and the roof rolled down. The strong winds blew the smell right off of Petunia, allowing Chunky to finally breathe. Unfortunately, the smell had wafted over to Russell's Fish and Chips, right as The Mole, town health inspector, had arrived. But that's a another story for another day.

Chunky, now able to get close, slipped his hand around Petunia's shoulder. She looked down from the sky and smiled at him "Eager, aren't you?" She said, and Chunky withdrew his hand. Petunia giggled a little at the blushing koala.

"I didn't say that was a bad thing"

"Oh, OH!" He said, wrapping his arms around her again "Sorry, just a little nervous…"

"Well, what you did today required a lot of courage" She said.

Chunky smiled at her "And wisdom, and power.."

"What?" Petunia asked, slightly confused.

"Oh, I was just talking about your gift." He said, and pulled the small black box from his pocket. Petunia's face illuminated with joy, and Chunky handed it to her.

"Can, can I open it now?"

"Of course, I wouldn't have given it to you if I didn't want you to know." She opened the box and held up the Tri-force gold necklace. With delight she pulled it over her head and held it lovingly in both hands. Looking it over, she noticed the inscription on the back.

"You, you had this customized for me." She said, almost tearing up

"I made it for you. It was originally a pin, but I always enjoyed a little metal working. I meant to give it to you around Christmas, but…"

Petunia was a little surprised by his words, and had to ask "Chunky, how long have you felt this way about me?"

"For awhile, I was just, shy and.." Before he could say another word, she pulled him close and their lips pressed passionately. His large hands felt blindly around her, finally resting on her back. She didn't take her petite paws off his collar for a moment. She still smelled terrible this close, but Chunky figured he'd get used to it, maybe even start to like it.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Awwww, so cute. I'm just so proud of the little tyke. It seems like just yesterday I created him in my mind after one too many HTF shorts. They grow up so fast.


	5. Break Down At The Restaurant

**Author's Note.**

You know, it's amazing how much of yourself goes into an OC, that's why I always try to make them something I am, not something I pretend to be or aspire to be. That's why Chunky's a grade-A nerd. Now that you know that, please don't give me a wedgie.

**Love Stinks**

It seemed like an eternity that they had been kissing for, but in reality it was only a few minutes. The convertible had pulled up to the restaurant, and Disco had waited for a good few minutes before honking the horn. The sudden jolt pulled both lovers out of their dream world, and hastily back to reality.

"You kids gonna go or what? I may be a pervert, but I'm not the kind who'd sit and watch his nephew and his girlfriend make out all night."

Both kids blushed and stepped out of the car, Petunia thanking him for the ride, and Chunky silently thanking him for the assist. As they walked inside, Petunia was awestruck by the beauty of the place. On the outside, it was a hollow tree, but on the inside, it was a restaurant of the highest quality; several floors were visible from the ground floor, as a large hole was in the center of each, directly above a large gilded fountain in front of the two. Lumpy, who was the maître d' and owner of the fine establishment, jumped with joy as another two customers entered. The place was busy, even for a new restaurant, and Lumpy called his only waitress, Flaky, to seat them.

"Um, Mr. Lumpy, sir? I'm bringing food to another table and.."

"Tut, tut, tut Ms. Flaky, remember our motto;" Lumpy said, pointing to a large portrait of himself hung on a wall. He read it aloud to illustrate his point. "The Lumpy is always right!"

"Oh, yes sir, of course." She said sullenly and placed the tray of food she had on her head while grabbing two menus. She went to seat Chunky and Petunia, and managed to bow apologetically with the tray of food on her head.

"I'm very sorry Sir, Ma'am, but our only available table is on the ground floor. I hope that is acceptable." Flaky said, her voice quavering as always.

"Of course, thanks Flaky." Chunky said, well aware of what it was like to be a waiter. The porcupine seated them at the booth, and asked them for their drink orders. Having that, she left to deliver the food on her head to another table.

It seemed like everyone and their family was there, Chunky looked around and spotted quite s few Friends. Giggles and Cuddles were on the second floor, Russell was enjoying a bucket of steamed clams by the fountain, but he seemed troubled and was eating heavily. Mime was sitting with him, consoling him and eating some invisible entree`, Handy was over at the bar, chatting and enjoying a drink with Flippy, or at least trying to. Splendid, in his disguise, was eating with some supermodel fox who one could assume knew Splendid's secret. Even Lifty and Shifty were in a booth across the fountain from them. Lifty was eating a meatball sub while Shifty was drinking some clear beverage, it appeared to be water, but given his slow, contemplative sips, it was probably alcohol. Oddly enough, a small raccoon girl was sitting with Lifty and Shifty, eating a bowl of ice cream. Shifty muttered something about how she should eat less ice cream, and the girl smiled and dropped a scoop of ice cream in his drink. He flipped and started yelling, but Chunky turned back to his date when that started.

"Everything alright? You seem like you're wandering." Petunia asked.

"Yeah, a little. I'm just surprised to see everyone, I guess it's pretty popular around here." He said, taking a roll and buttering it. It was odd, he could still smell Petunia, and she smelled AWFUL, but he didn't seem to mind. He just saw her, beautiful, and nothing else, and, okay she really did reek, but it was okay for now.

Petunia looked around and nodded, saying "I guess you're right, practically everyone's here. Well, almost everyone, I've yet to see Cro-Marmot"

"Speak of the devil," Chunky said, and pointed to a table on one of the higher floors, overlooking practically the entire restaurant was Cro-Marmot, dressed in a square suit. Flaky had just placed a large lobster dinner at his table, and poured him another glass of wine. The two broke down laughing, completely forgetting they were in a fancy restaurant, and almost didn't notice Flaky walking towards them, carrying their drinks. She was almost at their table when she smelled something horrendous, and stopped dead in her tracks. "Must be my imagination," She said to herself, and tried to keep going, but the stench was overpowering, and she stumbled woozily before falling flat on her face in front of their table. Chunky and Petunia leapt from their seats, Chunky trying to help her up, and Petunia kneeling down to see if she was okay.

"Are you alright Flaky?" she asked, but Flaky didn't respond immediately. Her vision had to steady first, as she had fallen pretty hard. Then, taking another look around, Flaky slowly realized where she was, and took one look at Petunia and pieced together what was going on.

"Oh god, Petunia's deodorizer isn't working!" She thought, "Stay calm, Flaky, remember how she lost it last time she found out." It had happened a couple years back, at Giggles' last slumber party. It was a girl's only affair, so they were able to keep the events of the party secret, including the expired deodorizer and inevitable OCD freak out it caused.

"Uh, sorry! Very sorry!" She said, leaping up, "I just, uh, slipped! Sorry, I'll just get you a new set of drinks, glass of milk and a Shirley Temple, right?" The couple set themselves back at the booth, slightly disturbed by Flaky's behavior.

"Yeah, that's right. Are you sure you're alright?" Chunky asked.

"Fine! Just, fine, now I'll go get you your drinks!" she said, and quickly scurried off back into the kitchen in the back. Once Flaky was totally certain that she was out of earshot, she grabbed a napkin, carefully tearing it to make nose plugs for herself.

Back in the restaurant, there weren't enough nose plugs in the world when Petunia's smell had begun spreading around. Russell, one of the closest to Petunia, had noticed first.

"Yar? What be that stink? These clams must be spoiled, and I thought this was a high class establishment!" He said, leaping out of his seat, "Let's get out of here Mime, you've got the check right?" Mime nodded, reaching into his pockets and pulling out some invisible money to pay the bill. He slammed the payment down and followed Russell out the door. Lumpy noticed this, and, desperate to save his business, ran after the two.

"Uh, wait! Don't you want to stay for desert?" He asked nervously.

"Desert? You're lucky I'm not on good terms with the health inspector or I'd have this place shut down! I've lived through years of low tide and never smelled something so awful!" and with that, Russell took Mime's hand and left. Lumpy, clearly aggravated, headed back into the restaurant to find the source of the problem, but was shocked when he saw practically every other customer piling out into the street. Giggles was holding a nauseated Cuddles, Cro-Marmot's Limousine had just arrived to pick him up, and Lifty, oddly without Shifty, was walking the Raccoon girl back home.

"C'mon now, you heard Shifty, You're parents are gonna kill us if I don't get you home soon," Lifty was scolding the young girl "Besides, if we stayed any longer you would have bankrupted us with all that ice cream!" Lumpy, confused and losing money, ran up to the raccoon, and asked, no, pleaded to him on his knees.

"Please, don't go! Tell me what's going on, why's everyone leaving?!?!"

"It's that koala and his girlfriend, she's kicking up a real stink in there!" Lifty said, and walked away, tugging on the other raccoon's hand. Lumpy gritted his teeth and walked back into the restaurant, but he took one whiff and puked, into the fountain of course. "I'll have Flaky clean that up later, but first.." he thought, and then hollered for his waitress "FLAKY! Get over here immediately!"

Flaky, who had just given the couple their drinks, ran back to her boss, and made every attempt to avoid eye contact as she answered him "Y-yes Mr. Lumpy?"

"I want you to get those two out of here immediately! And then I want you to give this place a serious scrub, it's gonna take at least three gallons cleaner to scrub out the bottom floor alone. Well, what are you waiting for? GO!" He shouted, and the porcupine yelped and scurried over to the table. Petunia and Chunky were simply enjoying their meals, oblivious to the fact that everyone had left. Everyone, save for the fedora wearing raccoon sipping his drinks in the booth across the room.

"Um, excuse me Chunky, could I speak to you in private?" Flaky asked, even more nervous than usual.

"Sure, why not? Excuse me Petunia." He said, getting out of his seat and following her over towards the fountain. Petunia, enjoying the date far too much to be concerned with what Flaky may have to say, simply took out a small hand mirror and began adjusting her hair.

"Well, um, you see…" Flaky began, looking down and twisting her toes of her shoes on the carpet.

"Is everything alright?" Chunky asked.

"Uh, no. It's, kinda, you know how there's no one else here?"

"Yeah, what's wrong?"

"It's, just um, kinda, Petunia is just…" Lumpy, thoroughly fed up with Flaky's nervous procrastinating, grumbled and walked up to Chunky, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him wildly.

"Your girlfriend freaking STINKS! You drove away all my customers, now could you kindly get the hell out?"

Petunia, who had been sitting happily, froze when these words hit her ears. Everything shattered, her world was spinning. Had she smelled all this time? And Chunky knew, he had to have known, why didn't he tell her? This was all some kind of joke. She was just a filthy animal to him, and then her will finally broke, and she screamed, breaking out in tears.

Before Chunky, or anyone could stop her, she ran crying into the bathroom, locking the door behind her. Chunky broke free of Lumpy's hands and ran after her, banging on the door furiously. Lumpy and Flaky just stood there, in grief.

"Petunia! Petunia, come out! I can explain!" He screamed, but no response. Inside the small, one person lavatory, Petunia splashed hot, soapy water all over her tearing face. She looked into the mirror, still crying hysterically and sobbed into it.

"He hates me, it was all a lie…"

Across the fountain, a raccoon sat, twirling a pine deodorizer on his finger while no one was watching. He took another sip of his drink and shook his head. "Give it up Chunky, it would have never lasted. They never do, never." He whispered softly to himself.

---------------------------------------------------

Oh god, this is the part. The tragic conflict when everything seems to crumble. But everything will turn out okay right?

Chunky: You're the author!

Oh yeah, so maybe they will…

Oh and Kitten630's Caramel made a brief cameo with Lifty and Shifty. I just thought adding them taking care of her would make the two seem less evil, and have more heart. Oh, and in case you're wondering, I'm going to put up a new Disco Rising Chapter tomorrow, in which two more OCs will make their appearance.


	6. Happily Ever After, Sort Of

**Author's Note**

I, I don't have much to say here. Let's all hope things turn out alright….

**Love Stinks**

Chunky, desolate and loveless, was kneeling in front of the door where Petunia had barricaded herself in lifelessly. His fists ached from pounding on the door, his nose still sour with her ripe odor, but worst of all were the thoughts plaguing his mind. That this was his entire fault, he had insulted her indefinitely more than he ever wished to by trying to overlook her faults. And, despite his best efforts, he began to cry. But he wasn't alone in his grief.

Lumpy, realizing what he had done had turned and walked away silently, hanging his head in shame. He seemed to drift aimlessly, but found a place to stand by his booth at the front of the restaurant. He pulled a few menus from the holder on the side and looked over them, seeming to be busy, but finally broke down crying like a baby, sobbing loudly and wiping his eyes on the sleeves of his coat. Flaky too was standing at a safe distance, her eyes tearing and legs buckling over the heart-wrenching guilt of what she could have done. She clenched her waiting tray coldly, as if she had never seen it before in her life, but still clung to it simply because she had nothing else. Her quiet sobbing was suddenly broken by a call from behind.

"Hey toots, can I get another vodka and club soda over here?" She turned to find Shifty, holding his empty glass and beckoning her. In a huff, she tromped over and slammed her tray down with an audible crash.

"Listen, you bastard, I hope you realize what's going on here! I didn't have a problem serving a minor vodka, knowing it was you, but you're sitting there sipping a drink and watching the show like it's a delectable Greek tragedy!" Her voice was fiery, as hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

"Hey, calm down, it's just a melodramatic couple breaking up." Shifty said, letting his fedora cover his eyes and block the heat from Flaky's vicious stare. "What makes them so special, it happens all the time."

Flaky wasn't dumb. Quiet, but certainly not dumb, and just when she was about to let into him with another vicious tongue lashing, she realized what Shifty had just said.

"Someone hurt you, didn't they? Someone left you" She said, accusingly. Shifty mumbled something inaudible under his breath.

"What was that."

"I said shut up, shut up! SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Shifty screamed and tossed his glass at the fountain, scattering bits of broken glass across the carpeted floor. "Why the hell do you care?"

"Because, you're behind this, and I don't like it. No who left you?" Flaky kept digging, knowing she was hitting a nerve.

"Nobody left me" He said, the rage in his voice dissipating. "They left my mother."

"What happened, your father left you?"

"Yes, he left me. He left me and mom and Lifty all alone. My mother has to work three jobs to support us and I always have to steal what I want. It's just not fair! Why, what did we do to deserve this?" Surprisingly, Flaky could see tears welling in the raccoon's eyes.

"You didn't do anything, but that doesn't mean you aren't going to suffer. Sometimes, life is hard, and you only make it harder by doing horrible stuff like this. But it doesn't have to be like this, and you can take your first step to getting better by undoing this. Help Chunky, apologize. And I can help you get back on the straight and narrow; maybe I can get you a job here?"

Shifty took the napkin off the table and wiped the tears off his cheeks. "That'd be nice. It could help."

"But only if you help those two out of the mess _you_ made!"

"Why should I?" Shifty said, defiantly. His hard shell was beginning to wax over his heart again.

"Because, maybe you're right, maybe they won't last, but who are you to decide that? And heaven forbid you ever destroy a relationship that could blossom into something incredible!"

"Okay, fine. I guess I do owe that obese f-" Flaky's glare caught his eye again, causing him to rethink his words "That koala an apology." He said, walking over to the bathrooms where Chunky sat motionless.

"Hey, Chunky, I er, have something for you" said Shifty, pulling the pine-scented deodorizer from his pants pocket. The fresh scent penetrated the stagnant air and the second it reached Chunky, he broke from his trance and turned with surprise.

"Where did you get this? Did you…"

Shifty turned away, his gut churning with guilt. "Yes, I stole it from Petunia, and gave her that dud. I'm, I'm sorry. I did it out of jealousy, mostly. And some crazy ideas I need to work on." Chunky smiled, and stood taking the deodorizer from his hand. "Thanks Shifty, I'm glad you came around." He said, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"So what, you just forgive me like that?" Shifty asked, surprised by his actions.

"Yeah, I'm not the vengeful type. Besides, Confucius once said 'When seeking revenge, one must dig two graves'" Chunky said, almost bragging with his knowledge.

"God you're a nerd. Anyway, the rest is up to you, you've gotta deal with crazy in there." Shifty chuckled while pointing to the door, and walked away to get another drink. Chunky took a deep breath and slid the deodorizer under the door. Petunia, who was still inside sobbing on the bathroom floor, felt it press up against her head. "Whuh, what?" She said, looking up and blinking away her tears.

When Petunia finally opened the door, Chunky saw she was still sobbing. Her eyes were hardly open, and she stuttered when she spoke to him.

"Please, j-just call d-disco and take me home." She said through her tears.

"Petunia, I want to let you know about tonight." Chunky started, but Petunia cut him off.

"Forget it, just leave me alone Chunky. I don't think we'll be seeing each other for a long time." Petunia was already walking towards the door, when Chunky ran in front of her and put his hands on her shoulders.

"Please Petunia, just hear me out." She stopped dead in her tracks at Chunky's words "Petunia, I've never met a more beautiful girl in all my life, and it's not just your looks, you're always so neat and orderly, I've never met a more fantastic girl in my life. And you know what, that's why I didn't mention your, um, smell. I love you, and I could totally give up breathing for you."

Petunia gave a tiny smile, and looked up at him "Really, do you really mean that Chunky?"

"Of course, I've never been more in love than I am with you. Though, you'd do best to keep that thing on." He said, and Petunia hung her head a little. "I just mean for the sake of others, I kinda like it."

"Ew! What is that, some weird fetish?" A very familiar voice called from above. The two looked up and saw Nutty laughing wildly. "Come on Petunia! He loves you, and you know it!"

Petunia blushed and moved closer to the koala "Well, you're pretty wonderful yourself. But I'm not taking this thing off in public again, no matter how much you like it."

Shifty called from his booth, probably a little tipsy "THANK GOD!" And the room exploded with laughter. When it finally settled down, Chunky glanced at his watch and realized they still had two hours before Disco was supposed to pick them up. "Well, the night's still young, though we might want to get out of Lumpy's hair, now that we've ruined business for him."

Just then, Lumpy approached the two, his face red from crying "Excuse me, but you two are no burden here. I'd like to give you this meal and a nice dessert on the house as an apology for my actions tonight, if that makes up for it at all."

Chunky was taken back, especially considering the prices at the restaurant "Yes, Lumpy. That'd be more than enough."

Nutty laughed and called down to the others "Yeah, 'specially because I still have your wallet!!!!!!"

Chunky screamed in anger and darted up the stairs, but didn't need to hurry, as Nutty was rolling around on the floor laughing. Petunia, however, was much more concerned with Lumpy's offer.

"Um, are you sure we can eat here? I mean, the place kind of needs to be aired out."

Flaky, actually somewhat cheery instead of sheepish, chimed in "Well, you could always use the roof!"

"The roof?"

Lumpy stepped forward "Well, we normally reserve the roof for very, *ahem* well paying customers, but I believe it would be appropriate."

Petunia's face lit up at the thought, and Flaky escorted both her and Chunky up into the roof of the building, taking a lavish gilded elevator up several floors. When they finally reached the top, the view was breathtaking. The roof itself was mostly covered in foliage, the restaurant being a tree itself. But the section they were in was just big enough to fit a couple dining comfortably. It was a balcony of sorts, but the tree covered it up, giving a one-way mirror effect as anyone dining on the roof was unnoticeable while they got a view of practically all of Happy Tree Town. After they had been seated, the two sat without a word admiring the world and enjoying each other's company. Only about fifteen minutes later, after Flaky had brought up a large ice cream sundae that Chunky immediately dug into, did Petunia ask Chunky something.

"Um, Chunky, I just needed to know." She said, inching closer to him, and slowly wrapping her tail around him.

"Hm? What is it?" Chunky asked, wiping chocolate sauce away from his face.

"Were you serious about liking my smell?"

"Well, it's not too bad now that I've spent some-" He began, but stopped when he realized Petunia's deodorizer had been thrown into his lap. He looked over at Petunia and noticed she was smiling seductively at him

"Well, too late now." She said and tackled him onto the floor of the roof. Flaky, who had been watching from the entrance to the roof balcony, giggled and closed the door, hanging a small sign on it.

Do not Disturb

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well, that's it folks. The end to a wonderful love story. As for what happens with Chunky and Petunia, well, let's leave that up to imagination. Now that I've finished this, I'm going to start on another Chunky story, kind of a sequel of sorts, "Family Reunion". Oh, and in case you're wondering, I will be continuing "Uncanny HTF Showdown", it's just taking me a while because the last fight was so great that I don't know how I'll top it. But I don't believe it will be Russell Vs Buddhist Monkey, I've got another fight in mind. Anyhoo, so long awesome internet people! Don't forget to review!


End file.
